


when i fall for that

by ashy (neighvael)



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: And Luke, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, M/M, Smut, and i mean fluff, and luke loves them, ashton loves her, calum and michael make an appearance, i can’t tag for shit sorry, luke gets petunia, petunia hemmings, they touch each other a lot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-06
Updated: 2019-04-06
Packaged: 2020-01-05 19:19:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,267
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18372428
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/neighvael/pseuds/ashy
Summary: Apparently, Luke has only two soft spots: Petunia and Ashton Irwin. Luke doesn’t think either of them realizes it.





	when i fall for that

**Author's Note:**

> if you want to, you can listen to:  
> i see you by missio  
> experience by ludovico einaudi  
> герои by sirotkin
> 
> english is not my first language so be gentle to me pls
> 
> please leave a comment if you have something to say x

He’s still living with Ashton when he gets the idea. By now, Luke knows he needs to learn how to be alone. Romantically, that is. He needs to learn not to crave romantic involvement for the sake of romantic involvement. He needs to pour all his love, affection and need into something less likely to break his heart. So Luke spends the whole evening on his laptop and on his phone.

The next morning Luke wakes up earlier than Ashton and spends half an hour convincing his body to go back to sleep, but then he hears the door to Ashton’s room open, followed by the soft sound of footsteps.

“Morning,” Ashton half-smiles when Luke walks into the kitchen.

He takes a sip of his morning coffee and Luke takes a deep breath enjoying the smell of it.

“Morning,” he can’t help but smile back at him.

Ashton grabs Luke’s cup from the cabinet and lets the coffee machine do the rest of the job.

Luke is nervous for some reason. Well, Luke is nervous for a particular reason but he’s 90% sure it shouldn’t be a problem. He’s leaning against the kitchen island, worrying his lower lip, watching Ashton check the weather on his phone. Ashton feels him staring so he looks up from the screen and gives Luke a concerned look.

“Hey, you okay?” he asks in the most gentle voice and Luke’s heart swells with love at this.

The coffee machine stops buzzing so Ashton puts down his phone and reaches for Luke’s cup.

“Yeah, I-” Luke sighs nervously. “I’ve been thinking about something. And I want your opinion on it.”

He takes his cup from Ashton’s cold hands, their fingers brushing softly. Ashton comes to lean against the kitchen island by Luke’s side, facing him.

“Go on then,” he says reaching his hand up to tuck Luke’s curls behind his ear.

And that’s what Luke loves so much about him if he’s honest. Since Luke moved in with him, sad and confused, Ashton has been allowing himself to be even more vulnerable, gentle and attentive than Luke already knows him to be. Even though most of the time they are still being silly and sassy with each other like they always are, Luke can’t even count the times Ashton’s hand has ended up on his knee during a movie night, or on his back, hugging him protectively, when Luke felt like crying his eyes out. Anything to say ‘I’m here for you and I love you’.

“Earth to Luke Hemmings?” he hears Ashton say and realizes he’s been silently staring at him, consumed by his memories and appreciation for Ashton.

“Uh, yeah, sorry,” he clears his throat. “So... I was thinking of getting a dog? Maybe?”

Ashton freezes. He opens his mouth to say something and then closes it, frowning. Then opens it again.

“A dog?” Luke nods, biting his lip nervously. “Okay,” Ashton nods to himself. “Why a dog?”

“Figured it’d be good for me,” Luke shrugs. “Something to take care of and put my love and time into, you know? Kinda cathartic.”

Ashton takes a moment to process. Luke takes a sip.

“So...” Ashton speaks up. “Do you wanna move out or something? Because fyi, that’s a terrible way to tell me about it, Luke.”

Luke is already shaking his head by the time Ashton finishes the sentence, “I don’t wanna move out! I know you’re hesitant about having any pets in the house though, but I’ll take care of it, I promise.”

Ashton frowns again, “I don’t know about this, Luke, honestly.”

“Please Ash, I really need this,” Luke is almost begging at this point, but he couldn’t care less. His voice gets a little quiet. “But I also need you. I don’t wanna move out, you are the best thing that has happened to me in a really long time, I-”

And wow, that went from zero to a hundred real fast. Even Luke is a little taken aback by his own words.

“Wow,” Ashton raises his eyebrows, tilting his head. “Damn that was kinda cheesy,” he grins.

Luke almost whines in frustration.

“You know what, just forget it Ash. It was a stupid idea anyway,” he puts his cup down and turns to walk away.

“Hey,” Ashton grabs his hand.

He tugs a little and Luke reluctantly turns around to face him again. Ashton intertwines their fingers.

“Come on, I didn’t mean it, and it was stupid,” he contemplates it for a seconds, but sighs. “I don’t mind a dog if that’s what you want, yeah? I love you.”

They are so close that Luke has nowhere else to look but Ashton’s tentative eyes. Luke sighs and nods, and Ashton lets go of his hand to hug him.

“Sorry for overreacting,” Luke mumbles into Ashton’s bare chest. “It means a lot to me Ash. I love you.”

They stay like this for a moment until Ashton says, “So, a dog, huh? Have a particular one in mind?”

 

***

 

“Today’s the Sausage Day?” is the first thing Ashton says coming into the kitchen five days later.

Luke squints at him.

“You keep calling her a sausage and you’ll fucking lose yours.”

“My dick is not a sausage,” Ashton scoffs, not even slightly intimidated.

“What is it then, an avocado?” Ashton opens his mouth to answer, but Luke adds, “If you say it’s a whole meal, I swear I’ll punch you.”

Ashton closes his mouth and laughs halfheartedly at this.

“You’re cute.”

Luke raises his eyebrows.

“When I’m angry or in general?”

“When you talk about my dick.”

Luke blushes and tells him to fuck off.

 

***

 

Ashton doesn’t let Luke drive, says he’s ‘too distracted today’. He gently slaps his butt as they leave the house so Luke doesn’t complain.

Ashton puts his hand on Luke’s thigh in the car to calm him down as he gets visibly nervous.

Luke doesn’t want Ashton to drive with one hand so far from the wheel, but still wants Ashton’s hands on him.

He compromises by taking Ashton’s hand in his and placing them both in Ashton’s lap instead.

 

***

 

“I can’t believe I’m about to meet her,” Luke says, his voice somewhat choked as he squeezes Ashton’s leg.

They are sitting in the waiting area, one of Luke’s arms almost hugging Ashton’s thigh, the other intertwined with Ashton’s hand. They said they would bring out the puppy in fifteen minutes. It seems like forever.

“Have you decided on the name yet?” Ashton asks, his thumb going in soothing circles on Luke’s hand.

Luke shakes his head.

“Have a couple names on my mind though. I’ll know once I meet her.”

Ashton presses a quick kiss to his temple and says, “She’s gonna love you.”

And she does. Once they bring her out and put her in Luke’s hands, she starts sniffing him and licking him. Luke feels his eyes water at how small and gentle she is, yet so bold and energetic. Luke feels a tear fall down his face. Luke feels happy.

Ashton decides not to interfere, decides to let Luke have his moment. He stands nearby watching him hold the puppy, hears him promise to love her and give her a home she deserves. Then Luke turns to him, his eyes watery, the happiest smile on his face.

“Wanna hold her?” he asks, so much raw emotion in his voice.

Before Ashton knows it, there’s a puppy in his arms and Luke’s face centimeters away from his.

“Petunia,” Luke mumbles happily, his hands coming up to help Ashton hold her.

“What?”

“Her name is Petunia.”

Ashton will probably never admit it but he feels his own eyes water as well, a little puppy in his arms and emotional Luke right in front of him.

“She is such a Petunia,” he says and Luke chuckles.

 

***

 

Ashton puts a towel on Luke’s lap and a safety jacket on Petunia on their way home.

“Ash?”

“Yeah?”

“Thank you.”

 

***

 

The first time she pees on the floor, Ashton is furious. He tries his best not to show it, but Luke cleans it up as quickly as it is humanly possible and comes up to Ashton. He snakes his hands under Ashton’s tanktop and massages his back trying to get him to relax.

“Don’t be mad,” Luke says pressing his palms into the muscles.

He feels Ashton’s body relax as he gently works every section of the spine.

“Are you happy?”

Luke smiles to himself, “I am.”

“Then I’m not mad,” Ashton sighs and leans into his touch. “But all the carpets will have to go for a couple weeks or so.”

“I’ll take care of it.”

“And she’s not allowed on the couches or beds for now.”

“She won’t be there then.”

“Good. Want a beer?”

 

***

 

The first week is pretty normal. Ashton spends most of his time reading a book, going to yoga and occasional parties. Luke declines all the invitations because he doesn’t want to leave Petunia alone or with someone else yet. He spends most of his time playing with her and training her. Ashton doesn’t really interact with Petunia all that much besides petting her when he comes home. It’s okay.

The end of the second week is when Ashton finishes the book and decides to take a break from partying.

“Lukey?” he calls from his room.

Luke is in the bathroom with the door open, trying to figure out which lipstick colour looks best on him, Petunia snoring at his foot.

“Yeah?”

“What time are you going for a walk with Petunia?”

Luke thinks for a second then says, “Well, I walked her at 8, then at 3, so probably somewhere 10-ish?” Ashton doesn’t say anything back so Luke asks, “Why, wanna come with?”

He freezes, waiting for an answer.

“Yeah, I do,” comes from the room and Luke grins at his reflection in the mirror.

“Hear that, pumpkin? Daddy Ash is coming with us today,” he tells Petunia.

“Daddy Ash?” Ashton’s voice is suddenly much closer and Luke sees him walking into the bathroom in the mirror.

“Why, would you rather be Mommy Ash?”

“Honestly? Don’t mind either way,” Ashton giggles.

Ashton looks around all the mess Luke has made in the sink. He reaches out and takes one of the lipsticks. It’s one of the slightly darker shades.

“I’d say this one for you.”

 

***

 

“So where are we going?”

“There’s a dog park five minutes away. I’ll drive,” Luke says.

That’s basically how Ashton ends up with Petunia in his lap, and Luke sees them interact properly for the first time.

Ashton is petting Petunia and talking to her in a silly voice, letting her lick his hands.

Ashton takes control of her leash at the park when Luke has to tie his shoe, and when Luke doesn’t take it back he doesn’t give it back.

That’s when it first hits Luke. Apparently, he has only two soft spots: Petunia and Ashton Irwin. Luke doesn’t think either of them realizes it. His heart hurts a little. He kind of wants to pin Ashton down and kiss him for that. He shakes the thought off.

 

***

 

Ashton is the first one who breaks the rule. One morning Luke sleeps in and wakes up to Ashton sitting in the living room playing guitar. And there’s Petunia, _on the couch_ under the blanket watching Ashton sleepily.

“She’s on the couch,” he says dumbfounded.

Ashton looks up from his guitar. His eyes move up and down Luke’s body quickly. Luke notices.

“She’s on the couch,” Ashton smiles.

“But- but what if she pees on it? I haven’t even walked her yet,” Luke says looking at the time on his phone. It’s 9:57.

“Oh, I’ve already walked her,” Ashton says not meeting Luke’s shocked eyes. Instead, he lays down the guitar and scoots over to Petunia. “We went for a little run, didn’t we, pumpkin?”

He beams and pets Petunia behind her ears. She moves to put her head in Ashton’s lap.

Ashton knows exactly what he’s doing. But Luke isn’t sure if Ashton knows what he’s doing _to him_ in particular. Maybe Luke low-key cries in the shower that day. And it’s happy tears. He’s happy.

 

***

 

It only goes downhill from there. Sometimes Luke catches Ashton taking pictures of Petunia. Sometimes Luke wakes up to an empty house because Ashton is taking Petunia for a walk. Sometimes Ashton’s swinging hand catches his and doesn’t let go when they go to the dog park in the evening. Sometimes Luke’s fingers stay on Ashton’s thigh on the ride back home. Sometimes Luke lets himself think about kissing Ashton for a little longer.

 

***

 

Something happens when Luke comes back from the gym late one night.

He put the keys down, drops the gym bag on the floor and goes to the living room. He’s thinking of grabbing a water from the fridge but stops in his tracks the second he steps foot in the living room. Ashton is curled up on the couch in a king-sized blanket, his arms wrapped around Petunia protectively. They both seem to be asleep.

Luke feels a ball of pain, love and gratefulness unravel in his chest. His breathing picks up and he rubs his eyes. He takes his phone out without even fully realizing it. Making sure the flash is off, he takes multiple pictures.

Luke lets this feeling take over him for a moment or two and then suddenly he can’t take it anymore. It hits him all at once, and it’s so overwhelming that Luke feels the need to get some fresh air _right fucking now_. He goes straight to the balcony.

All he can think about is how much he loves Ashton. Ashton takes care of her. Ashton takes care of _him_. This is too much.

The sound of the balcony door open must’ve woken Petunia up because Luke hears her running out to him. He rubs his eyes again before picking her up.

“Hello there, pumpkin,” he kisses her nose. “Miss me?”

Petunia sneezes in response.

Luke hears footsteps and looks up to see Ashton coming up to them.

“Did I wake you up?” Luke asks and it’s a bit out of breath.

“No, she did,” Ashton nods at Petunia in his arms. “Though _you_ probably woke _her_ up, so actually yeah, you did. I don’t mind though.”

It’s quiet for a moment, Petunia’s grunting the only sound in the calm of an LA night.

“You were cuddling her,” Luke manages to get out. He tries his best to push all of the confusing emotions aside for the time being.

Ashton grins.

“Maybe I was, maybe I wasn’t,” he taps at Petunia’s wet nose softly and she sneezes happily at this. “Ain’t got no proof, Hemmings.”

“Maybe I don’t, maybe I do,” Luke teases back.

“Did you take a picture?” Ashton asks, raising his eyebrows.

“Maybe.”

“Still doesn’t prove anything,” Ashton squints at him. “Maybe I was trying to strangle her.”

Luke laughs.

“Shut up, asshole,” and then adds, his voice getting small, almost inaudible, “Just admit it already, you love her just as much as I do.” 

Ashton shakes his head.

“No way, I’m only doing it for the money.”

“Yeah, for all the money you _spent_ on her treats two days ago?” Luke snorts.

Ashton laughs and nods, and it’s quiet again. He comes closer to them.

“I do love her just as much though,” he pets her in two wide movements.

“I know I was the one who said it in the first place, but as much as I love her?” Luke scoffs. “ _Impossible_ , and you know that.”

“As much as I love you then,” Ashton smiles and Luke is so fucked.

“And how much is that?”

Luke wonders what it would feel like to kiss Ashton right now.

Ashton shrugs, “You know... Enough.”

Luke can think of a million different comebacks but says nothing.

 

***

 

Luke is not okay.

 

***

 

Calum and Michael come over to meet Petunia a week later. Petunia licks all over Michael’s face and Calum points out that she was licking her butt two seconds prior. It’s all good. Michael talks about his trip to Ibiza, Calum talks about not jerking off for a whole week because he was sick. Luke talks about Petunia.

Ashton talks about _Luke_.

He talks about how Luke talked him into getting a dog, how excited he was to tell Ashton about her, how they drove to meet her for the first time. He talks about how Petunia _totally_ hasn’t peed all over the house yet. He talks about how he hadn’t expected that having a dog would be this nice and how he loves seeing Luke happy. Somewhere in the middle of the story Ashton stops to fix Luke’s hair and say how out of control it is today. Luke says Ashton’s the one out of control but smiles nonetheless.

Then Ashton gets a message from the delivery guy.

“I’ll go get it,” he says before getting up and going to the door.

Maybe if Luke could tear his eyes off of Ashton, he would notice Michael and Calum share a glance.

“So?” Calum says the second Ashton is out of sight.

Luke turns to look at him.

“So what?” he blinks.

“So what’s up with you and Ash?” Calum clarifies, but that doesn’t clarify anything for Luke.

Or maybe it does, but Calum doesn’t have to know about that.

“What’s up with me and Ash?” he parrots.

Michael scoffs at that.

“Okay, if you don’t wanna say it, I will. Are you two fucking or something?”

Luke’s jaw drops a little. Calum doesn’t even have the common decency to tell Michael off.

Instead he says, “That’s one way to put it, but basically yeah. Are you?”

They both stare at him, waiting for an answer.

“W-we’re not fucking, are you two out of your fucking mind?” Luke finally manages to reply, immediately hating himself for stuttering.

“Why the heart eyes then?” Michael asks.

“Why the what?”

“The _fucking heart eyes_ , Hemmings. You keep looking at each other like you two need a room. Did we miss something? What the fuck?”

And that– that is totally not teasing, that is genuine concern in Michael’s voice like he’s just trying to understand.

“You are all touchy-feely, can’t keep your eyes and hands off of each other,” Michael elaborates. “You were fucking _flirting_! Right in front of us!”

“You got a _goddamn dog_ together, Luke,” Calum adds.

“You know Petunia is _my_ dog, Cal,” Luke argues, and it’s pathetic, honestly, how he chooses to argue this and not the rest.

“Yeah, and that’s why she’s been sitting in Ashton’s lap since we came here?”

Luke is running out of answers. He’s been running out of answers to Ashton-related questions for quite some time now.

“I was just busy in the kitchen and-”

“For christ’s sake Luke, are you just playing dumb or are you genuinely so fucking dense!” Michael snaps and the room goes quiet.

Luke looks down to where Petunia has crawled under his arm, avoiding eye contact.

“Quit the bullshit already, would you?” Calum’s voice is suddenly softer, almost sympathetic. “Look, if you don’t want us to pry, we won’t-”

“We will,” Michael interferes, and Calum nudges him.

“-but we are actually worried, okay?”

Luke doesn’t react. His chest feels tight and his eyes are burning.

“Luke, look at me,” Calum asks gently. “Please.”

So Luke does.

“You can tell us stuff.”

Luke bites his lip.

“Even stuff I can’t tell Ashton?” he asks weakly, surrendering.

Michael sighs and leans back, looking up, as if to say ‘fucking finally’.

Calum’s smile is understanding when he says, “Even stuff you can’t tell Ashton.”

Luke hears Ashton’s footsteps.

“I’ll tell you once I figure it out myself. I promise.”

And that’s the most honest answer he can give.

 

***

 

Ashton goes for an evening run and Luke decides that he needs a shower. He stands under the water for ten minutes trying to get his shit together.

Luke gets out of the shower, heavy feeling in his chest, and puts on a shirt. He goes to put on his briefs but catches his own reflection in the mirror of the closet and stops. It’s a baggy shirt, probably one of his or Ashton’s comfort shirts. Luke examines himself in the mirror: messy damp hair, tired but happy eyes, black nail polish. He pulls up the shirt, exposing his soft cock to the cool evening air.

Michael’s words keep replaying in his head. _“Are you two fucking or something?”_

Luke hesitantly brings his wet hand down to wrap around the cock. He thinks about fucking Ashton. He thinks about Ashton fucking him. Luke’s thoughts are all over the place, jumping from one scenario to another. He breathes out shakily, settling for the easiest one. They are in Luke’s room and Ashton is kissing him. Luke feels his cock twitch at that. As he is picturing Ashton push their bodies together, grind against him and strip him off of his clothes, his cock grows hard in his hand. Luke gives it a few pumps, grants his reflection one last look and gets on the bed.

Once Luke gets comfortable, his (or Ashton’s) shirt pulled up, the blanket covering his legs up to the knees and his hand lubed up, his fingers begin stroking his cock lazily again.

Luke decides to go straight to the main part then. He thinks about straddling Ashton’s hips as Ashton’s hands caress his thighs. He thinks about what it would feel like to have Ashton inside him. He thinks about what it would be like to feel so full of Ashton.

The fingers of his free hand make their way to the lube and before he knows it he’s pushing two fingers inside himself. It’s been a long time since Luke did this.

Luke thinks about riding Ashton, hearing him moan, kissing him. He thinks about Ashton talking to him, praising him, touching him wherever he can reach. He thinks about making Ashton’s toes curl from pleasure, about pressing Ashton’s hand to his lower stomach and asking him to come inside.

He thinks about what it would feel like to be made love to by Ashton. He thinks about what it would feel like to make love to Ashton.

He thinks about what it would feel like to _be loved_ by Ashton.

That’s how he comes, his eyes closed, mouth open, thinking about Ashton coming inside him. 

He’s fucked and he knows it.

 

***

 

Luke sits in the kitchen drinking green tea and trying to tame the hurricane in his belly. He can feel the flames of guilt, affection and anticipation spread inside. He just wants Ashton to come home already, the real Ashton, so that the only Ashton on his mind wasn’t the one moaning underneath him, thrusting his hips up to move inside him.

When the door finally opens and Ashton comes in, all sweaty and flushed, Luke’s stomach and chest go tight. Petunia runs to him immediately, and Luke spends at least five minutes watching Ashton sit on the floor cross-legged and play with Petunia.

“Hey there, Panic,” Ashton says referring to Luke’s shirt once Petunia decides it’s time to lick her paws now.

Was it so fucking hard to change? No. Did Luke do it? No. He simply nods, suddenly feeling even worse now that he has to look Ashton in the eye.

“You look flustered,” Ashton giggles as he opens the fridge. “Did you jerk off or something?”

Luke chokes on his tea and looks up at him. He opens his mouth but doesn’t say anything. He misses the exact moment where it would still be acceptable to make a joke and laugh it off. Ashton catches up.

“Oh wait, fuck, you did?” he asks, then his eyes go wide. “Wait no, sorry! Holy shit, wrong question, don’t answer.”

So now it’s awkward.

Kind of.

And that’s new. The thing is, they’ve known each other for too long, seen each other naked and walked in on each other too many times to be embarrassed by things like this. But now Luke can’t help but blush aggressively because hey, yeah I did, but this time I jerked off to you. And that’s affecting Ashton for some reason because he blushes too.

Luke frowns.

“Okay, we’re gonna pretend this didn’t just happen, I’ll make more tea, you’ll get the chocolate and we’ll binge Brooklyn 9-9,” Ashton says not looking Luke in the eye. “Deal?”

“Deal,” Luke says quietly and gets up to get the chocolate.

 

***

 

After Ashton’s showered they do, in fact, end up binging Brooklyn 9-9, but Luke can’t concentrate. They are cuddling, Ashton on his back, Luke on top of Ashton. Luke genuinely doesn’t know how this keeps happening. It just does. One second Ashton and Luke are sitting on different ends of the couch and the next Luke is falling asleep on Ashton’s chest. Petunia is curled up somewhere in their legs. Ashton is warm and safe, and Luke wants him so much. Luke wonders if he’s actually going insane.

And it’s not just him. Ashton’s hands are underneath Luke’s clothes, his fingers drawing shapes on the soft skin absentmindedly.

The air feels different. Now that Luke knows it he realizes it’s been different for a while. There’s this electric fizzling between them since their conversation in the kitchen. He knows they have been sharing too many touches, too many quiet conversations at 2 am, too many intimate moments over the past few months. It’s fucking with Luke’s head and he can only guess whether it’s fucking with Ashton’s head too or not. He lets out a shaky breath which develops into a yawn. Ashton glances at him quickly and scoots up a little, half-sitting now. Luke moves around getting comfortable in the new position, which causes his legs to move as well, and Petunia is not happy about that. She complains but readjusts nonetheless.

Ashton reaches for his phone to check the time. Luke’s is closer so he takes it instead. Luke squints when the screen lights up and feels Ashton’s stomach tighten just a little bit under his hand.

“Wow,” it’s barely audible but still gets Luke’s attention.

“What?”

Ashton turns the phone to show him and Luke realizes that it’s  _his fucking phone. With that fucking picture_ he took of Ashton and Petunia.

Was it necessary to make it his lockscreen? Probably no. Did Luke do it? Fuck yeah, he did.

Ashton knows, Luke thinks, he can feel it in his bones. Ashton sees right through him.

“She’s already kinda bigger than she was then.”

Luke knows it’s not what Ashton wanted to say.

“She is,” he nods and his voice cracks. “She’ll be the size of a chair in a week, I swear to god.”

Luke wants something to happen so bad. Ashton turns his head to look him in the eye. Luke gulps. His head is on Ashton’s shoulder and they are too close.

“Why this picture?” Ashton asks and he seems nervous.

Luke doesn’t have the power to look away no matter how much he wants to.

“Don’t know, wanted something with Petunia as my lockscreen,” which is not entirely a lie, Luke has to remind himself.

“Yeah, but- but why _this_ picture, Lukey?” Ashton insists, and this is too much.

The softness in his voice is too much. The boiling anticipation in it that Luke hears or maybe hallucinates is too much. The nickname is too much. This is all too much for him. It’s almost as if Ashton actually _wants_ to hear the answer Luke wants to give.

Luke sighs and blinks the already forming tears out of his eyes.

“Because she makes me happy,” he says. “And you make me happy.”

He can swear Ashton’s breath hitches when he sighs out, _“Oh.”_

Ashton’s eyes are searching Luke’s face for something. Luke holds his breath. Ashton’s hand cups Luke’s cheek. Their eyes meet again.

“I love you,” he almost whispers, and there’s something else lingering behind these words, something that has always been there before, but not to the full extent.

“Yeah?” Luke asks because he’s that dumb.

“Yeah,” Ashton says and presses their lips together gently.

Luke’s heart is beating fast. Ashton is _kissing_ him. He moans quietly into his lips and kisses back. They shift, Luke’s hand coming up to the back of Ashton’s neck, Ashton’s hands tugging at his shirt to touch the skin again. Luke misses the moment when the tongues are introduced but Ashton tastes like chocolate and green tea. He can't believe this is actually happening. With Ashton, out of all people. They are kissing for what feels like forever before Ashton’s grip on him tightens and he flips them. They hear Petunia grunt, jump off the couch and wander off to the kitchen.

Luke spreads his legs letting Ashton’s hips collide with his. The kiss is getting more heated as they slowly grind against each other. Luke feels like crying. This is too much, this is too fast, but he’s not going to complain. 

“Oh f-fuck,” he says when Ashton moves down to kiss his neck. “Oh fuck, I can’t believe we’re doing this.”

Ashton hums in agreement, biting on his neck gently, “Yeah, I know, baby, I know.”

Luke whimpers at the nickname and feels his cock twitch. It’s like he’s on fire.

It’s not long before Ashton is palming Luke through the sweatpants asking if that’s okay. Luke whimpers again mumbling _“yeah yeah, please touch me”_ because _holy fuck, that’s more than okay_. It’s somewhat embarrassing how wet he is already when Ashton wraps his fingers around him for the first time. His grip is strong and gentle at the same time.

“Is that good?” Ashton moves to his side, presses close to Luke as he kisses him again moving his hand up and down his cock.

Luke moans and mumbles something about how hot Ashton is. He can’t take it, he’s never been so close so fast since he was a teenager. He wants to get his hands on Ashton.

“W-wanna feel you Ash,” Luke manages to get out between the kisses. “Can I touch you?”

“Please,” Ashton breathes out grinding against his hip.

So Luke does. 

Ashton’s cock is thick and leaking in his hand. Lube would come in handy right now, but Luke doesn’t really care. He’s jerking Ashton off, not even trying to keep up with his pace. Ashton is a really good drummer for a reason. Luke was missing out all these years.

“Is that what you thought about,” Ashton picks up the pace, “when you jerked off today?” Luke whimpers. “Use your words for me, baby.”

So Luke does. He tells Ashton how he wants his hands on him all the time, how he wants Ashton to talk to him like that, how he wants Ashton to _take care of him_. He tells Ashton how much he loves him.

“Fuck, L-Luke, I love you so much,” Ashton says it back, and Luke is _ecstatic_. “I’m close. Gonna come for me, baby?”

“Y-yeah,” and that’s all Luke can say before he’s spilling into Ashton’s fist feeling Ashton follow him right after.

 

***

 

They talk it out. It’s okay.

Luke sleeps in Ashton’s room that night, Petunia snoring at the foot of the bed.

 

***

 

He thinks he might want to tell Michael and Calum about that. Maybe he should just leave the handjobs part out of the story though.

**Author's Note:**

> hope you liked it! planning on writing a sequel later so stick around
> 
> find me on twitter: twitter.com/lashtonese


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